Library 2026-01-20
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Library 2026-01-20

All books by Carlton Mellick III
Alphabetical index of the 16 books
The Cannibals of Candyland
Carlton Mellick III
There exists a race of cannibals who are made out of candy. They live in an underground world filled with lollipop forests and gumdrop goblins. During the day, while you are away at work, they come above ground and prowl our streets for food. Their p...
Crab Town
Carlton Mellick III
In this town, everyone's a bottom feeder ...Five desperate criminals are robbing one of the last remaining banks in Freedom City, a town devastated by the previous nuclear war. But these are no ordinary criminals. They are members of the House of Car...
Cuddly Holocaust
Carlton Mellick III
The war between humans and toys has come to an end.The toys won. Teddy bears, dollies, and little green soldiers-they've all had enough of you. They're sick of being treated like playthings for spoiled little brats. They have no rights, no property, ...
Every Time We Meet at the Dairy Queen, Your Whole Fucking Face Explodes
Carlton Mellick III
Known for his cute, disturbing, and utterly absurd novels, cult author Carlton Mellick III returns with a tale of childhood love and spontaneous face explosions. Ethan is in love with the weird girl in school. The one with the twitchy eyes and spider...
The Haunted Vagina
Carlton Mellick III
It's difficult to love a woman whose vagina is a gateway to the world of the dead...Steve is madly in love with his eccentric girlfriend, Stacy. Unfortunately, their sex life has been suffering as of late, because Steve is worried about the odd noise...
Kill Ball
Carlton Mellick III
In a city where all humans live inside of plastic bubbles, exotic dancers are being murdered in the rubbery streets by a mysterious stalker known only as Kill Ball.
The Morbidly Obese Ninja
Carlton Mellick III
These days, if you want to run a successful company . . . you're going to need a lot of ninjas.Neo Tokyo, California is a city built so high that none of its residents have ever seen the ground. It is a place where citizens cosmetically alter their b...
Parasite Milk
Carlton Mellick III
Irving Rice has just arrived on the planet Kynaria to film an episode of the popular Travel Channel television series Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern: Intergalactic Edition. Having never left his home state, let alone his home planet, Irving is hit...
Satan Burger
Carlton Mellick III
"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring." --**Chuck Palahniuk ** Satan Burger is the international cult hit that has grown such an enormous following over the past 10 years that it not only launche...
The Terrible Thing That Happens
Carlton Mellick III
"A new spin on the post-apocalypse genre. One you won't soon forget." --Garrett Cook, author of A God of Hungry WallsThere is a grocery store. The last grocery store in the world. It stands alone in the middle of a vast wasteland that was once our wo...
Zombies and Shit
Carlton Mellick III
"For fans of zombie fiction, this is an absolute MUST FUCKING READ!" - JEFF BURK, author of Shatnerquake_Battle Royale_ meets Return of the Living Dead in this post-apocalyptic action adventure. Twenty people wake to find themselves in a boarded-up...